La Guardia (Night shift) # 1

I’ve delivered four babes here now and am technically getting accustomed to hanging the baby upside down after delivering, but don’t think I will emotionally acclimate. Though baby hanging is seemingly set in stone at this point, other practices might not be so firm. I was thrilled last night that I almost convinced the team to help mama get into hands and knees for an occiput posterior baby. They were really thinking about it!!!! I thought we were about to do it, and then the mama pushed so hard and out came her sunny side up, facing directly up, BIG for Peru, baby.

My second baby catch was beautiful and everyone applauded me for doing it their way.  The mother of that mama came back to the unit during the afternoon of the next day and gave me a huge bag of fruit. Wow did that feel so nice. See photo of mama and her 2kg baby! I shared the bag of fruit with everyone. Here, everyone shares everything. It’s beautiful.

On another note, I can officially say that I have slept with an intern now. I’m not sure that was a goal exactly, in fact, I’m sure it wasn’t !!! but…  See pictures of my best friend on the L and D unit who helps me with millions of things. We haven’t been super busy on the unit, so we found a bed to lay down in. Everyone sleeps together in the few beds on the unit when it’s slow. I actually slept for a minute despite the two of us beinig squished into a tiny single bed! Also see photo of one of the Midwives who is so kind to me. They wear purple scrubs.

Though I don’t have fleas, thank the lordee, I did discover ants all over my bed. Ick! They are tiny and all over the place here. I am desperately trying to be ok with sharing my bed with them and making them my friends, but am having a hard time. (see photo of my bed and my bathroom that I have made all my own).  I have never been a bug killer, but have had to make some tough choices here... Look what I’m becoming! Killing bugs and hanging babes upside down...  

I still feel short of breath when I think of home. I have realized that these are mini panic attacks that I experience anytime I’m alone and without distractions. They are REALLY hard. Sleep deprivation isn’t helping and I had my second major breakdown.

Came into the city to call family and friends in the US. Call and Cry I call it. Like Shake and Bake, only different. Hee heeeeeee.

Came up with a plan and am busy implementing it today. Decided that one thing I need is to not work 18 hour shifts twice a week. That’s hard in the US where I have a support network and get great sleep during the day, let alone when I’m trying to learn a new language, culture, make friends, live in a room where the water comes out brown, sleep with ants,… All that stuff. I had a friend come check out my ants and she said it’s totally normal here. Vivimos en la tierra, Elizabeth! We live in the earth!

As I went to talk to the director of Midwifery today to tell him my plight, the one and only psychologist at the hospital called my name, and called my name again and again, until I realized he was calling to me! How apropos!!!! He must be goooooood at his job. I confided in him and he was so supportive and lovely. He opened his door to me and said that anything I told him would be in confidence. What a good psychologist/therapist man. This gave me more courage to talk to the director, who also completely understood and informed me that they want to support me in whatever way they can. Of course, I could possibly be making up stories in translation again J. Either way, I like the way it all turned out and I will work less hours during the week now.

Really want to find some Spanish classes to take, but haven’t had any luck. Found some salsa classes and hope to start tonight. I need to dance!!!!!

Encountered my first english speaking looking person on the streets of Pucallpa after crying in a telephone booth during my Call and Cry session yesterday. I couldn’t help but approach him for some English conversation. He is from Australia and we talked for an hour before meeting up with his two friends from Spain. We ate a refreshing dinner together. They left for Spain today. Hope to have a few more encounters with English speakers soon!

I think about how great it would be to just come home ALL the time and every single day, over and over again, question whether I have the strength to do this.

We’ll see!!!!!

Love to you all,

Beth

PS, couldn’t help myself - took my dirty clothes to a lavandaria today. Thank GOD!